It’s Sunday night, about 10. And since I have a few hours before I have to go out and start fighting crime, I’m on the Internet, where I’m reading about tomorrow, when Kerry Wood and Mark Prior are both scheduled to pitch in a real live, honest-to-gosh game of baseball.

The nature of time has been one of the great scientific mysteries that humans have ever encountered.

Time once again to renew my annual loud, obnoxious and ultimately futile call to reduce Wrigley Field to tiny, tiny pieces as soon as is humanly possible under the current rules and guidelines enforced by the various neighborhood associations and alderman (i.e., 34 years).

Whatever your opinion of them, non-native birds are here to stay. We might as well accept them and — dare I say it? — enjoy them. I confess that last spring I caught myself admiring a starling. The bird was on the ground, warming itself in the sun on a chilly morning. From my angle, the rainbow effect on its iridescent plumage was striking.

Day six in a post-Anna Nicole world, and only now do I finally feel like things are starting to get back to a fragile sense of normalcy. For instance, this afternoon I turned on the TV, and they were talking about some dude with a beard named Mahmoud something or another. I didn’t catch the name. Long names make me sleepy. Anyway, he seemed angry.

For Lexi Tameling, Glen Ellyn resident and owner of the Sanctuary Day Spa in Wheaton, getting into the beauty business was as natural as, to pardon the expression, falling off a horse.